Posted by: birdsongslaw | October 1, 2009

Weird Criminal Law Stories 89

Birdsong brings you more weird criminal law stories. Enjoy.

England: a peg-legged, epileptic Alice Cooper fan was spared jail time after punching out a complainer at the aging rocker’s “Schools Out for Summer” concert in England.  The slugfest began after John Lynch demanded calm from over-spirited Andrew Miller who had climbed up on his seat in front of Lynch, took off his shirt and prosthetic leg and waved them around.  Miller took offense and punched Lynch in the face.

Should we even describe someone as “peg-legged” these days?  Sounds more like a pirate.

Iowa City, IA: Here’s one way of taking care of obligations.  An Iowa City teenager allegedly robbed  a bank to get enough money to pay off the bond Read More…

Posted by: birdsongslaw | September 29, 2009

Weird Stories from Germany

Years ago Birdsong was stationed in Germany as a State Department officer. How about a few recent weird stories from Germany.  Ja voll.

Germany: The world’s biggest underwear thief is now locked up.  German police uncovered 1,000 pair of underpants after they caught a 46-yearold man swiping three more.  He claimed he acquired them in car-trunk sales and over the Internet.

There is a whole lot more to this story that Birdsong just does not want to know…

Germany: A jealous husband in Germany  hired assassins who four times botched hit jobs on his wife.  The first attempt  failed when the target never showed; the second when a group of school children disrupted the killer;  a third came when a neighbor suantered by; and finally when the woman manged to escape the attack.

Hit and miss assassins… It’s cheaper to keep her.

Germany: A German drunkard stumbled into an open drain and got stuck in the hole because of his beer gut. Read More…

Posted by: birdsongslaw | September 24, 2009

Weird Criminal Law Stories 88

Laguna Niguel, CA: They say that the pants were down but so was the size of the crowd at a cheeky Southern California event.  Only 400 people showed up  for the annual Moon Over Amtrak Fest in Laguna Niguel, where people line up to moon passing trains.  Last year, about 8,000 showed up, forcing deputies to shut it down because of traffic jams and drinking.

Drinking and mooning — a bad combination!

Saginaw, MI: A parolee who robbed a Michigan bank was caught when he tried to hitch a ride from an undercover police detective, Read More…

Posted by: birdsongslaw | September 22, 2009

Weird Criminal Law Stories 87

Philadelphia, PA: A suburban Philly man wanted passionately to stop children from playing in front of his home.  But when Michael Buck, 27 blared a pornographic soundtrack to repel children from his cul-de-sac, he also pissed off neighbors a block and half away.  Police arrested Buck, who will have to do 20 hours of community service and undergo anger-management counseling.

  Debby Dallas, maybe?

Salt Lake City, UT:  35 years to pay his debt to society.  A Salt Lake man who stole a stop sign in 1974 Read More…

Posted by: birdsongslaw | September 17, 2009

Weird Florida Stories

Florida is a wonderful place to live.  Birdsong loves it here.  Here are a few weird stories from Florida for your reading enjoyment.

Orlando, FL: A man entered a Greenacres Restaurant in mid-July, 2009, and asked for change for a $10 bill.  When the cashier asked to see the bill, the man reportedly began screaming, “I want  change!”  Police said the man then grabbed about $40 from a tip box, picked up the cash register and ran out.  The officer who arrested him — still carrying the register while running down the street — had just come from reviewing surveillance footage at a nearby convenience store, where lottery tickets had been stolen a day earlier.  By chance, the officer identified the man as the thief  from the footage.

Actually, running with a cash register can be more dangerous than running with scissors…

Winter Park, FL: The family of Charles Gaal Jr., 90 is suing a Winter Park dentist who allegedly dropped tools down Gaal’s throat, including an implant screwdriver and a mini-wrench.  Unfortunately, Gaal never fully recovered and he died in 2007.


Orlando, FL:  a Connecticut man  arrested for exposing himself to a 14 year old girl at a Walt Disney World water park, swears it was because his “Europeanr-style” bathing suit slipped off.  witnesses told police that Bradford Pellet Biggers, 51, was fondling himself as he lay on a lawn chair about four feet from the girl.

Yeah, right, the suit just slipped off… He’s a perv.  Lot’s of them hang out  at water parks.

Miami, FL: A Miami area trauma doctor performing surgery on a shooting victim removed one of the slugs that the police needed for evidence and tried to hide it in his glove to keep as a souvenir.  The surgeon initially lied to cops, telling them he wasn’t able to remove the bullet, but another doctor snitched on him.


West Palm Beach, FL: Man is dog’s best friend.  David Grounds, 65 lost two fingers while fighting a 7-foot alligator that had clamped its jaws on his Wheaten terrier.  The West Palm Beach civil engineer said all that mattered was that his pooch, Mandy got away safely: “I’d do it again,” said Grounds.

Bow  Wow!!!

Orlando, FL: The last time Rachel Veitch bought a car, gas was 39 cents  per gallon, Lyndon Johnson was president of the U.S. and “The Little Old Lady from Pasadena” was a hit song.  The 90 year old Orlando woman still drives her 1964 Mercury Comet Caliente every day.  It recently passed 599,000 miles.  Veitch who has outlived two husbands and is a breast cancer survivor changes the oil every 3,000 miles.  She maintains exhaustive maintenance records for the vehicle, which she has named Chariot.

She sounds like the little bird…cheap, cheap, cheap….

Posted by: birdsongslaw | September 15, 2009

Weird Criminal Law Stories 86

Bismarck, ND: Police responding to a domestic disturbance arrived at Stacey Anvarinia’s home to find the mother breast feeding her 6 week old baby in front of them.  And She was drunk, they said!  Officers arrested the woman who later pleaded guilty to child neglect and faces up to five years in prison.

Now her case has touched off among moms about breast feeding, alcohol — and privacy.

Since Anvarinia’s arrest, blogs have been abuzz with comments questioning whether breast feeding mothers could risk criminal charges if they drink even modest amounts.  Authorities insist police were right to make the  arrest, even if the mother had not been breast feeding.

Birdsong disagrees!  We have already criminalized too much conduct in this country.  I ask my criminal law students to weigh in on this question:  Should police  arrest breast feeding mothers who may have consumed alcohol?  Why or why not?

Posted by: birdsongslaw | September 10, 2009

Weird Criminal Law Stories 85

Birdsong brings you a few more of those weird criminal law stories from around the country and the world.

Albuquerque, NM: A passenger stripped naked during a US Airways flight and resisted efforts to cover him witha blanket before two off duty law enforcement officers on board subdued and handcuffed him.  Keith Wright, 50, of Bronx, New York, was taken into custody after he disrobed while sitting in his seat at the back of  the plane.  The plane was carrying 150 passengers from Charlotte to L.A.  Wright punched and kicked the flight attendant who tried to cover him with a blanket.  She sought assistance from the off duty officers.  After landing in Albuquerque, Wright told the FBI he suffers bipolar disorder and had not taken his medication before leaving New York.  Wright had no memory of the flight or his behavior on the plane.

Bet they saw his “nuts” on that flight.

Chicago, IL: A United Airlines flight attendant was arrested after he allegedly rubbed the hand of a 16 year old passenger and made inappropriate comments to the boy Read More…

Posted by: birdsongslaw | September 8, 2009

Weird Criminal Law Stories 84

Chicago, IL: A man in his 80’s accidentally shot his wife and niece on a Sunday, summer afternoon in 2009.  The out of town man was playing with a gun on the south side of Chicago when the weapon accidentally discharged about 2:10 pm, police said.    The bullet went through his wife’s leg and then struck his niece.  The wife, in her 70’s, and a niece in her 50’s, were taken to the hospital.  Police detectives say the shooting was accidental and no charges are expected to be filled.

What an old fool!  Two victims with one shot.

Elk Grove, CA: A northern California elementary school teacher sent her students home for the summer with a video of class memories, only the DVD included six seconds of her having sex on a couch. Read More…

Posted by: birdsongslaw | September 3, 2009

Weird Criminal Law Stories 83

Birdsong brings you a few more weird criminal law stories.  Enjoy.

Rising Sun, MD: A man faces drunken driving charges after a deputy pulled him over and noticed he was naked below the waist. A Cecil County Maryland sheriff;s spokesman reports that Jonathan Schultz, 41, “was driving commando”  — only partially covered with a towel on his lap.  He was wearing a shirt. Schultz  was  stopped going 69 mph in a 50 mph zone.  the deputy smelled alcohol and noticed that Schultz was exposed.  He told the deputy he had lost his pants.  The deputy didn’t find any pants in the car.

Sounds like a drunken pervert…

Naperville, IL: Eager to buy himself a present on his 19th birthday, Michael Wells Jr. chose an unusual way to spend the day — he tried to break into a Naperville home.  DuPage county prosecutors say Wells’ May 13, 2009, plans included selling Read More…

Posted by: birdsongslaw | September 1, 2009

Weird Criminal Law Stories 82

Chicago, IL: A U.S. Postal worker sobbed  loudly and proclaimed his innocence as he was ordered  held without bond on charges that he sexually assaulted  and kidnapped a pair of teenage girls after he forced them in his personal vehicle in two separate attacks.  “I have no record,” Tommie Naylor told the judge.  “I’m clean.”  Naylor, a mail handler is suspected in at least two other similar attacks from 2003 and 2006, according to Chicago police detectives.  Police have DNA evidence linking him to the 2006 attack.   At the bond hearing Naylor sobbed constantly before the judge and exclaimed, “Sir, I’m going to lose my job.”

Right!  Big man with young girls.  Crying before the judge like a little bitch!

Los Angeles, CA: Twenty more people have been arrested in an investigation that charges a Latino street gang with waging a racist campaign to eliminate black people from a southern California city.  The arrests stem from a sting against the Varrio Hawaiian Gardens gang, which primarily operates in Hawaiian Gardens in southern L.A. County.  An indictment unsealed in May 2009 details attempted murder, kidnapping, drug and other charges related to the gang’s attacks.

They sound more like the Los Poco Locos!

Concord, NH:  A convicted tax evader has denied at his trial that he booby-trapped his New Hampshire property to kill federal agents.  Ed Brown testified that explosives in the woods around his fortified home were designed to scare off intruders, including agents — not harm them.  He says he stockpiled weapons and explosives because a failed arrest attempt convinced him authorities planned to kill him.  Brown and his wife, Elaine, were on trial for amassing the arsenal to kill agents during the nine months they hid out in thier  home after being convicted of tax evasion.

“I wanted to scare them — not kill them,” is not a really good defense to these charges….

Wilkes-Barre, PA: A man who lived in a Pennsylvania family’s attic for more than a week has been sentenced to jail time.  Stanley Wayne Carter was sentenced recently to from nine to 23 months in jail after he pleaded guilty to burglary.  Carter, 21, of  Arkansas apologized to the homeowner and her family.  Carter had been staying with the home owner’s neighbors.  When the neighbors asked him to leave, he went up into the attic shared by the two homes and lived there for 10 days.

In jail he will get three hots and a cot everyday….much better than the attic.

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