Posted by: birdsongslaw | August 6, 2008

Weird Criminal Law Stories 4

More weird criminal law stories for your enjoyment.


Romania: Police in a remote part of this country pulled over a  speeding car.  The driver claimed he was Robert de Niro, the American actor.  The man handed police ID papers bearing the star’s name.  Turns out the driver was  part of a forgery gang.

What chutzpah.

Cookeville,TN:  Police recently arrested a one wheeled motorcycle daredveil.  Officers said a 29 year old man popped a 400 yard wheelie on his motorcycle.  The offense drew a reckless driving arrest.

Was that a motorcycle or a “donor”-cycle he was riding?

Daytona Beach, FL: Lt. Major Garvin was fired from the Daytona Beach police Department for demanding frequent free cups of coffee at a local Starbucks under threat of slowing down his response time in the case of a 911 call there. Baristas said Garvin would come in as often as six times a night for coffee.

Giving away all that free coffee must have put a hole in Starbucks’ profits!

Bronx, NY: The New York  Post reports that a  combined Subway Sandwich  shop and stripper business was recently shut down.

Anthony “Cousin Vinny” Agnello ran afoul of trademark lawsuit for offering Subway’s signature 6 foot sandwiches – as well as Subway wrappers, bags and menus –  in his X rated deli.  Agnello, 48, had sent out fliers promising customers free fountain sodas and $5 foot long subs alongside “six hours of nonstop, hardcore, live action from some of the most beautiful young ladies who have ever chosen to take their clothes off in Public.”

A federal judge ordered him to stop using the trademarked goods in his skin scheme and forced him to pay more than $12,000 for the chain’s legal fees. A fter the court’s ruling a disappointed Agnello said, “The money in stripping isn’t as profitable as it used to be. This Subway was my golden parachute.”

It occurs to Birdsong that it just does not seem that Subway sandwiches and naked women  would go well together.




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