Birdsong has been proud to showcase over the last few weeks some of the poems and writings of his daughter Krystal who passed away in September. Krystal was a very intelligent girl and an excellent writer. Birdsong misses her so! Here is a longer piece Birdsong found in one of her composition books. It was written during her last semester of high school. Although I do not truly know what was on her mind, I wish to share her thoughts with a wider world. Enjoy.
You saved me today. Your sweet black chaos and hatred surging through me. Yet so tame until darkness comes. Darkness is your light. Darkness is when you feel safe enough to touch me, to permeate me. Hate permeating hate. Oh, so sweet in the silvery golden light of day! So heavy and real at night. IN night. In me. The blood drops slowly out of my heart and arms, leaving me a lovely gift in place. A gift of ethereal brown and rancid that only I could love it. You tell me that you care for me and will love me, but you don’t appreciate the inside. How can you not know what’s inside?
Didn’t you create me? Create this at least? I’d rather have the darkest soul than have you live inside of me like this. Comrades of yours say that your relatives are even sweeter. Sweeter! How magnificent and dreadful it could be! To taste the death and emptiness creeping over my lips, slowly crawling over my tongue would be — just be. Instead give me what you claim to own…
The blood of Jesus Christ
–Krystal Birdsong 3/19/00