Here are a few more of those weird criminal stories brought to you by Birdsong.
Saginaw, MI: Some boom boom with a vroom-brom! Jason Savage, 29, was sentenced to 90 days in jail for performing a sex act with a vacuum at a Saginaw car wash. Appalled witnesses immediately called police. Savage pleaded no contest to indecent exposure. He has been ordered to submit to drug testing.
Was the sex act missionary or doggie style?
Darien, CT: Talk about having a bad day! A man who robbed a Darien bank wrecked his getaway car and then took a bus and taxi home, only to find his roommate dead from an apparent suicide, said police. David Maksimik, 59, was arrested after he called 911 to get help for his friend. Unfortunately responding police found the money from the bank robbery.
Some days one just can’t catch a break….
St. Louis, MO: Please plan your escape route before you commit the robbery. St. Louis police were able to stop the woman, who allegedly tried to shoplift $1,200 worth of goods from a store, when she got confused and kept trying to go out the automatic “in” door. She then became agitated which drew authorities’ attention.
Elkhart, IN: Some find god in different ways. Cops who busted up a meth lab in Elkhart found the chemist’s recipe for making the meth mix hidden inside a bible. Another lab was found in the same building two months earlier, after an explosion.
Manhattan, NY: A 17 year old victim who was riding a Manhattan subway at 10:45 on a weekday morning was asked for the time by a young thug. When the 17 year old ignored him and proceeded to get off the train the mugger snatched his ipod. When the teen demanded it back, the thug pulled out a hypodermic needle and stabbed him in the stomach. The youth was tested for HIV but test results were not yet available. The stabber remains at large.
Baltimore, MD: Prosecutors in Baltimore have agreed to let a religious-cult member charged with starving her baby son to death withdrew her guilty plea if the child is resurrected. Ria Ramkissoon, 22, kept the boy’s body packed in mothballs for months because she thought he would come back to life.
Sorry, sister…Easter is over!