Birdsong brings you more weird criminal law stories. Where do they get some of these folks!
Plover, WI: DWI and DWP — driving without pants. A woman in Wisconsin crashed into a ditch after her pickup truck — with her pants hanging out the window to dry — veered off a highway. Jessica Jackson 29, had been chatting on her cellphone when she wrecked her truck outside the town of Plover. Police said she blew more than double the limit on the breathalyzer.
Talk about hung out to dry….
Nevada: A legal bordello in Nevada has announced it has hired male prostitutes to broaden its business. One problem is that although state law allows guys as well as gals to ply their trade, it also mandates cervical exams for all hookers.
Guys…bend over and spread them….
Vassalboro, ME: A Maine man was arrested for MUI — mowing under the influence. Danforth Ross, 51, of Vassalboro, and a pal were accused of riding his lawn mower for a beer run. However, Ross’ driver’s license had been revoked, so when they needed more beer they hopped on his mower, police said.
Fulton, NY: An upstate New York man and his alleged drug dealer were arrested in Fulton on narcotics charges after police saw an unusual trade. Angelo Colon allegedly bought a $50 bag of crack from Omar Velez for $10 — and half a slaughtered pig! Velez told police he had planned to cook the pig to celebrate a relative’s release from prison.
Right…He was living high on the hog. Yuk, yuk, yuk…
Phoenix, AZ: Not even the house of the Lord shall be exempt from the city’s noise code. A phoenix church bishop got a 10 day suspended jail sentence because the tolling bells of the Cathedral of Christ the King were too loud, sparking complaints from neighbors. Bishop Richard Painter said he would appeal.
Appeal? Now I get it, “a peel” like in a bell….how smart…